Good-bye Harry Potter

We purchased the seventh and final book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on the way home from the wedding. I started reading it Sunday night and finished it yesterday. My children weren't too neglected. They were all fed and dressed. Luckily, our dear friend and neighbor girl was here to play and wee C took a very good nap, so I don't feel too guilty. I finished reading last night and I am happy to report that I was pleased with the book. J.K. Rowling was respectful of her characters and readers both and I think wrote a respectable closure to the Harry Potter tale. I am grateful. Thanks, J. K.!

I am now free to devote August to Childbirth Educator certification requirements, sewing and enjoying the last month of summer. Here's hoping that my homework is completed quickly and easily.

What we do for Family

I come from a large family of eight kids and I am the oldest. All of our names begin with 'T' and I was dubbed 'Big T' by our dad. The nickname has been adopted by friends, too, not sure why that is as I am not particularly 'big'. But I like the reminder of my place in the sibling order.

My sister and sibling #6, was married this past Sunday at a small ceremony in the woods. It was a lovely chance to gather with all eight of the sibs and many members of our family. With so many of us, it is rare for all 8 of us to gather together, though we do try once or twice a year.

Here are we eight T's all together. There are more picture's over at flicker. Check out the picture of my three brother's shirtless. I must say, they are all hotties!The past month has been busy with planning, shopping, sewing and baking, all in preparation for this wedding. Even though they wanted a casual, small, picnic-like affair in a park by the river, there are still many detail to be planned and carried out. I volunteered to bake cupcakes for the affair, which turned out to have more guests than any of us anticipated, a little over 100. Cupcakes for 100, I baked 166 in all! Whew. I survived, and learned a lot. And would do it again with all I know now. Tips: cupcakes freeze well; unwrap before thawing, which takes about 1 1/2 hours; piping frosting goes really quickly; you can purchase cupcake carriers from your local grocery bakery, making transportation a breeze. They were cute and everyone seemed to like them.


The little girls outfits were sewn by myself and my mom. I made the shirts, one niece's skirt and one for myself. My mom made the babies' dresses, bloomers and tiered skirts. We used fabric from Denyse Schmidt's Katie Jump Rope collection. They looked so very cute. We neglected to get a group photo of the cousin's all dressed up, but here are a few photos of a few garments, worn and alone. Don't the girls look adorable?

Rain

I am soaked to the bone, sitting here savoring the coolness that thunderstorms bring. I just walked home from my favorite restaurant with a dear friend in the pouring rain. And it was so much fun. I felt like a little girl, we laughed all the way home. And it felt delicious after a hot sticky day.

We returned home from the coast yesterday, after camping in a yurt for four days and three nights. And, diehard tent campers though we are, it was luxurious to have a dwelling to stand up in and to be able to sleep in a real bed. A step up from car-camping, and a real treat. We recommend it. It was good to get out of town, away from obligations here and spend time with the kids. They are growing so quickly, each into their own individuals (and are they ever unique individuals.)

The week ahead will be a busy one. My sister is getting married next Sunday and I am making 150 cupcakes for the casual event. Wish me luck.

And if you are looking for a great restaurant in SE Portland, check out the Country Cat. It is a fabulous place, now open for lunch Wednesday-Friday and a fabulous brunch on Saturday and Sunday. No, I am not biased, they are dear friends. Ok, maybe just a little, but they are wonderful folks and amazingly talented. Love them!

Summer

is here in full swing. Hubby has been home for the second week now, cleaning and organizing the basement and building bike racks to hold our growing collection of bikes. It is nice to have him around.

The kids are enjoying neighborhood friends. I love having the kids play together all day, bouncing back and forth between homes. Fun summer nights culminating in a Ya Hala meal shared between two families and kids occupied enough to allow the adults a soak in the hottub. (Yes, all were properly attired.)

I had maybe the best birthday ever. My dear sister and her whole family were in town for an unexpected visit and were able to be here to celebrate my birthday with me. She and I got up early on Saturday for a walk up Mt. Tabor, then a trip to Portland Farmer's Market. The lovely birthday ended with a barbeque here with many members of my family and good friends. Good food, loved ones and chocolate cake- what more could a girl ask for?

I am now on a yeast-free, sugar-free diet. What fun is that, you ask? No fun at all. But I hope to curtail my sugar cravings and step into a healthier eating pattern. But, geez, it's summer and it is so hard to refrain from eating all the fruits of the season. A month, only a month.

I finished my 2 nieces shirts in time for them to try them on while they were here, so the hems would be proper length. The girls are going to look so cute together. Sister #4 (#6 sibling) will be getting married on July 22nd and we are just beginning all of the preparations. It will be so fun to have all of my brothers and sisters and many cousins together for the celebration.

I know my posting has been sporadic. Some of it is the dread of posting pix which for me takes a lot more time. Some if it is having serious musings which are difficult for me to put into words here on this blog. I am not sure how much posting I will be doing here, but will hopefully get into the routine of checking in. We'll see.

Happy Summer, everyone!

Boring

My life is boring. Or at least, everyone else's life seems so much more exciting than mine. I would rather read about other's life adventures and projects than blog about my lack of.

Knitting is going slowly. Still on jaywalker #1. Not sure I really like the pattern. Next socks will be either a plain sock or Monkey. No other projects on the needles.

Insteak, I have been sewing. I made a shirt for E and for lil' C. Peasant style. Cute, but the pattern needs a bit of tweaking. I made a skirt for E yesterday. My friend bought a skirt for her daughter from a children's clothing boutique- it is so cute. A simple a-line with elastic in the back. So, I made a pattern and whipped out a skirt in a couple of hours. Now I need to make one for myself.

Dh's biking obsession has bitten me a wee bit. Rode to Portland Farmer's Market on Saturday with a friend. It was so much fun. I really want to incorporate bicycle commuting into our lives. Good for health, for the environment, for the entire family. Now I want a mixte- so cute!

C just got braces. He totally looks like a teenager. He is growing so fast! Went to outdoor school last week and his class campout this week. Plus copping a wee bit of attitude. All normal signs of growing up.

Two more weeks of school for E. Three for C. I am looking forward to summer and not driving as much. The garden is planted. Peas, tomatoes, lettuce, squash, carrots, onions, cukes. No beans. Why? 'Cause I hate them, that's why. We will have raspberries for the first time. Blueberries and Jonagold apples. Let's see how much food we can cram on our 50' by 100' lot. Yippee!

Sleepy Musings

This morning, a dear friend and I had a discussion about my current state of frustration with my energies- physical, psychological, emotional, relational. From her perspective, and it is true, I am making this choice to be crazily sleep-deprived, to breastfeed and co-sleep with 18mo. old Caroline. I and the rest of my family are effected tremendously, deeply at times. And yet, I believe so strongly in how I am mothering Caroline right now, meeting her needs and am not ready or willing to make a different choice, even if it seems like the rest of my family may be suffering. It was a hard discussion, though good to bring into my consciousness the confirmation that I am making this choice, both Mike and I are. It is our choice, right now, won't be like this forever, just a small blip in my/our lives.

Another dear friend sent me this today:

Musings on the Benefits of Sleep Deprivation
by Gina Qualliotine


Seeing sunrises

Seeing the moon

Dreaming more and remembering dreams more

More fluidity between dreams and waking state

More moments to hang out consciously still half in a dream state

Breakdown of more conventional notions/experience of time

Breakdown of selfishness, learning to be of service with joy

Breakdown of expectations of "if I don't get such and such hours of
continuous sleep I feel terrible the next day. " In reality, sometimes
you feel terrible, and sometimes, or for some moments, you don't


Bringing up of deep shadow material, the parts of oneself that
prove definitively that you have more in common with axe murderers
than you ever before realized


Hearing the first bird of the morning begin her song

Nursing in the beautiful shades of light of twilight, midnight,
wee hours and dawn


Truly valuing sleep when you do get it

Getting to know the night noises of your home, family, neighborhood

Watching other family members sleep, beautiful innocent children all

Humorous "one down man-ship" discussions with one's partner about
who's getting more sleep, rest, working harder, etc.


Solidarity with mothers everywhere

Solidarity with those who are sleepless everywhere, many for harder
reasons than that they are caring for a precious babe


Sitting in peaceful quiet

Being in touch with the exact time of the early morning when you
can start to hear the birds


Interesting midnight snacks

Feeling such gratitude to my Mother for all the sleep I "deprived"
her of and the fact that she didn't view it that way


Learning what fatigue can feel like in my body, exactly where do I
feel it?--


Learning presence (rather than thinking of the past (last night
when you didn't sleep) or the future (tonight when you probably
won't either) being compelled to be aware of the present moment,
precious, singular, and spacious.


Learning not to expect in the daytime to be able to do what I
always do at the pace I always do it. Learning to slow down and do
things at a pace that I can be happy doing them or at least more
comfortable

She had no idea how much I needed to hear this today. These mama musings, plus this remind me this choice is worth it.

Shedir!

Shedir
Yarn: Rowan Calmer Onyx- a wee more than 1 skein
Needles: sz. 3
Modifications: 8 rows of ribbing and only 4 pattern repeats

Really, how does one photograph one's self flatteringly???

So glad to be finished so I can move on to other projects. Namely Jaywalkers on 2 circs. And I have been drooling over the new colors at Blue Moon for a Chevron Scarf for myself. I just cannot decide on which colors.

Bought some fat quarters at Bolt for more baby bibs. I will try to post pics when I have have some finished. My cousin just had a baby girl yesterday, so Emma Rose should be receiving a couple of these in the near future.
Wee C is a happy girl- very fun right now. Her vocabulary is exploding as is her ability to self-entertain. Yay!

This weekend is a big one for me. I am attending the first weekend of my Childbirth Education Training which will enable me to teach childbirth classes. The training is through the local midwifery school. I am excited and nervous, too. I hope my family survives without me.

Yes, I'm back

We have spent the week trying to get back in the groove. Our trip to Joshua Tree, CA was good. Not great, but it was really good to get away with our family and friends. I feel like my brain got a vacation from the pressures of my life at home, but my body did not get the rest I was hoping for. The drive down was fine. We succumbed and purchased a portable dvd player and it was quite helpful. As much as I would like to live in nostalgia and I think, 'by george, we didn't have dvd players in the car when I was a kid, my kids won't either!', it actually kept my squirly, squirmy, high-energy girls- wee C, too- occupied, thereby allowing dh and I to have a fairly peaceful drive. I mean, it is almost 1000 miles, one way and we make the drive one-way in 2 days. So, we compromised our ideals a wee bit.

I did not get as much knitting done on the drive, or the whole 'vacation' as I would like, go figure. I sat in the back with the girls so I could help keep the peace, reading stories- 'Up, up, up' by Dr. Suess is lil' C's fave. I started the Jaywalker twice and ripped it out twice. My tension was off and I think I need to knit the smaller size. I got a bit tired of Jaywalker and my lack of progress, so started Shedir on the way home. It is a great pattern, lots of wee cables and twists and Rowan Calmer is a dream to knit with, very soft and forgiving. I am so glad I know how to cable without a needle. Grumperina has a great tutorial. Check it out. She is brilliant. I am still working on Shedir, it is not a quick knit, just a lovely one I recommend.

The weather was colder than we have had in year's past. It was lovely and warm the day we arrived in the park, Sunday. Sunny on Monday, but the wind picked up in the afternoon and it howled all night. Dh and C were sleeping under dh's handmade tarp tent and it flapped all night. The girls and I were fine, but I worried about my boys and it was noisy, so I didn't sleep well. Tuesday morning was really windy and cloudy so we headed to town for supplies. As we arrived back in camp after lunch, it was still windy and cold- cold enough to snow and snow it did. We stayed in the car while the kids watched a dvd, I knit and the snow fell for about an hour or so and stuck enough to make for a lovely scene. It was kind of fun, acutally, though I never ventured out into the flurries. The rest of the week was cool and pretty breezy. Thursday it was clear and the wind blew itself out so we had a quiet last night. Friday was beautiful and calm and warm, much more typical for this time of year. Aah, well. We did not get as much climbing done because of the weather, but we did get to do some. I climbed on Thursday, a climb I have done before, but when I was in my best climbing shape, many years ago. And, I got to the top! I had to rest a bit, but it was kind of like riding a bike, my body remembered and I did much better than I thought I could. So that felt great. We got to hang out with our dear friends from Eugene. And got better aquainted with a family from pdx. They are good climbers and a great family, we enjoyed their company very much. E had fun with their 3 yr. old tri-lingual son. His papa speaks Finish to him, his mama speaks Vietnamese to him, and they speak English to each other so it was really fun to listen and ask questions. It was great for my kids to hang out with a multi-cultural family and hear their stories.

I am trying to examine my life right now and figure out how to best spend my time. I am not sure what I want this blog to be. An online personal journal, a light-hearted crafty knitty blog, or some sort of combination. What and why and who am I doing this for. There are so many amazing writers, crafters, knitters and bloggers out here in cyberspace. The list of my favorites is wayyyy toooo long. I am such a perfectionist and feel that I am falling quite short of my blogging aspirations. We will see what the future brings for moody mama and her musings.

I leave you with a few pictures from our trip.

Spring Vacation

I have been a bit scarce lately. Preparing for our road trip, almost 1000 miles one way with 3 kids, then camping with no amenities makes for a lot of planning and work. And then this week, I attended a birth lasting all day and night, with a horrendous cold, and I started menstruating again- after more than 2 years, with Caroline's pregnancy and breastfeeding. Of course Aunt Flo would come visiting again just when I least wanted her to. Oh, well. It is a good sign that I am actually getting by body back again.

I am looking forward to getting away from all of my daily responsibilities here. Hoping for lots of knitting, sun, good times with friends, a little bit of climbing and fun and adventures with my dear family and really hoping to come back home refreshed.

Glimpses of Spring

Spring is peeking it head through the clouds of winter, teasing us with sun breaks, followed by rain showers. This year is the first year that I can feel how the winter effects my mood and I am looking forward to our Spring Vacation in the Southern Cal desert.

Esther's school auction was a success. I am glad it is over. I am now on call for a birth, and am hoping it is this weekend. The car is tuned up, new tires and ready for a road trip. I am squirrelling away goodies to pull out during our trip to keep little (and big) children happy. I have a few new knitting projects started- Branching Out scarf; Cabled Hat for Caroline, though I am not thrilled with the color; and am ready to cast on for Shedir in Rowan Calmer Onyx, though am rethinking the color there, too; and ready to cast on for Jaywalkers, too, but I may wait until my LYS has Addi turbos in the size I need so that I can knit with two circulars. I have ambitious plans for our many hours in the car.

Caroline has a cold. Plus she and I are battling thrush. Sleep is still scarce, but I am getting enough to stay relatively sane. I am keeping my head down, just trying to get through these obligations in March. Looking forward to a week away with my honeys to bask in the sun, sun, sun.

Here are pictures of our little bathing beauty.

Sleep....

.... is what I need. It creeps up on me and then when Caroline (enough with the psuedonyms) has a bad night, it tips me over the edge. I forgot that. We both had the stomach virus, she nursed exclusively for over a week and then had a few restless, cranky nights. My body is taxed. I don't even feel sleepy until it's too late- until I am melting down and don't know why and then I realize I am exhausted. So.... I am focusing on getting more sleep. Who am I kidding, I will not get 'enough' until she is night-weaned. We probably won't get to implement a 'sleep plan' until summer. So for now, I need just enough to keep my sanity. Am needing to back off on obligations, again. Less computer time, too. I get soooo sucked into other people's lives and accomplishments. Then I don't need to focus on my own, I guess. Hope I didn't freak anyone out! I am feeling much better.

On a brighter note. We are planning on heading to Southern California for Spring Break. I am so looking forward to a roadtrip to the desert. Well, actually being in the desert sounds wonderful, but driving there with a one-year old is a bit freaky. So, here's to getting through March- a birth, preschool auction and planning and packing for a week-long camping trip and looking forward to hanging with my family and friends, sunny weather, lots of knitting (jaywalkers, cable hat for Caroline and lace scarf is on my list)and listening to my new red ipod my honey got me for valentine's day.

treading water

...just trying to stay afloat. or have i fallen off the tight rope, unable to find my balance and catch myself? i have found myself thinking that anti-depressants don't sound so bad. today i self-medicated with caffeine, yes, 2 shots in a light-vanilla-latte. i am bone-weary, not tired or sleepy, just so very weary. i hate feeling out of control, unstable, sucked dry. spending too much time deep in my head, trying to find my way out. snapping too often at my dear children when they need something. where, oh where has my patience gone??? i know that everyone is tip-toeing around me right now. i remember tip-toeing around my mother. hate that i am reminding myself of her, back then. don't like this part of myself- don't like what i see. my family is getting the worst of me- truly my crap. i am not resigned to always being here in this place, just don't know how to climb out of the pit. i can see the light, just don't know what will pull me out. but i know i will get there. i see glimpses, glimmers of who i want to be . i will come back to health, will be whole again. i need some time for myself, which is hard to say- ask for, because the brunt falls on dear husband, who gives so much. i am already away for obligations, but that time is spent giving, giving- to others, which takes away from my family. i have overcommitted again, i need to let go of obligations. to remember that unless i am bored out of my head friggin' head, just say 'no'! unless it is just for me. for fun, for fulfillment, for some peace.

more ponderings. trying to figure out what kind of birth work i should be doing right now, if any. questioning my doula work, my cbe training. and then.... 3 inquiries in a week, 2 vbacs. wanting me? maybe. i find myself wanting to talk with them, to support them, i am passionate about this work. but not sure i have the energy. does it deplete me or recharge me? maybe both. maybe not right now, but i see that it can be both.

i am truly grateful for what i have. for a husband who loves me in spite of myself. for my three sweet children who do the same. for my health, my home. for dear friends who understand.

see, i feel better already.

Juggling

Always juggling. One person or another's desires and demands or needs. Yesterday it felt like I was in the car all day, running 'hither and to'. One child dropped off here, another there. Groceries, gift returns, naturopath appointments, preschool board meetings. Nursing breaks, eating on the go- I want my life to slow down, to be able to be in the moment, to enjoy and cherish the now. Priorities are constantly on shuffle mode, the plan changes moment by moment. Like right now, Caroline woke up while I was laying her down for her nap. I was looking forward to some peace and quiet to..... clean? eat breakfast? knit? vaccuum? the possibilities were endless. So... regroup, plan 'b' or is it 'c' or 'd'? I am not a naturally flexible, go-with-the-flow kind of girl. But I am learning this lesson. I will learn this lesson, by george. I know I am not alone in this daily, moment by moment dance. Here's to sisterhood. Now I am off to change clothes and take my baby out for a walk and enjoy this beautiful day, and cherish the now.

Wildfire

It swept through like wildfire. A norovirus we think. While dear sister and her family were here. We had a huge family gathering the day before, and yes, it swept through the extended family, too. My dad, his girlfriend, 2 sisters, 1 brother, a boyfriend, 2 nieces, brother-in-law, 2 nieces, 2 cousins, myself, lil' C and C-boy- about half of us. It is interesting to see who this virus spared. E was perky and healthy in the midst of all of us sickies.

We are now on the mend. Though lil' C is still recovering. She was the first to succumb. It is heartbreaking to have a baby who is vomiting. The look in her eyes as she threw up over and over, not knowing what was going on, shaking her head saying 'no, no', broke my mama's heart. She has not eaten much for 6 days, relying on mama's milk for her sustenance and comfort. It is not enough to sustain her though, and she is losing those delightful baby rolls. It is unnerving how quickly she has shrunk, how tiny she looks right now. She is noticably lighter, too.

On a lighter note, we had a wonderful time with my sister and her family (well, until the virus, that is). It was such a treat to have them staying with us. My kids love hers, they pair off well. I absolutely adore them all and wish desperately that we lived closer.

Happy Endings are the Best

Chocolate, red wine, popcorn, a sappy, romantic chick flick seen with a dear friend- what could be better? A rare treat, a movie seen at my local theater within walking distance. No kids, just me and my friend who I heart very much. Mindless, sappy, happy-endings are the best. Yes, I cried. I admit I am weepy. I mean, I cry watching Hallmark commercials, for crying-out-loud. It was just what I needed.

Dear sister and her family are coming in to town to stay with us this weekend. All 8 of us siblings will be together for a belated christmas gathering. I still have a few knitting projects to finish. Yes, evenn though I had an additional month and a half to complete them, I am still cutting it close. I knit 2 hats, some fingerless gloves, a bonnet for my niece (which I hate- the yarn, the pattern, the colors- oh, well, live and learn, maybe I can salvage it, still). We will all gather at my brother's house, all 23+ of us for a holiday brunch and gift exchange. I am excited to see my dear sister, we are close and only get to see each other a few times a year.

Other news... on the marmalade front, four batches later, I still love the stuff. The grapefruit was a bit too firm, but tart and yummy. I am still learning the cooking/pectin process. The third batch is my favorite- Organic Navel Orange, perfect consistency and balance of flavors. My chef friend said, and I quote, "thats the best damn marmalade I have had!" I had a fleeting thought that I might be able to market the stuff. But it is sooo time consuming. I did purchase some of June Taylor's from a local gourmet food store and, really, I and dh, like mine better. I prefer very little pith, just pieces of sweet citrus peel. It truly tastes like a spoonful of sunshine.We will see if the love affair continues.

Happy weekend, everyone!

And then there were two...

Yesterday was E's 6th birthday. Yes, she was born the day after C-boy's birthday. I tried to tell her the story of her birth, telling her the details of what was happening at a particular time six years ago, but she wasn't too thrilled. She said if she wanted to know about it she could have a baby herself- not sure she was going to have a baby because it would probably hurt, and she has LOOONG time to think about it, so 'mama stop!'

Her birth was actually the most enjoyable of all of my births. It began gently in the wee hours of the morning. Contractions every 5 minutes for an hour, so it must be time! Called dear friend Tessa who had a 2 hour drive. My naturopath was my labor support, and she headed over about 4am. By the time she arrived, the contractions had slowed, of course, so we all went to bed. I had 3 hours of solid sleep, surprisingly. Up at 8 and we had a lovely, leisurely breakfast of eggs, sausage and cinnamon rolls ( I still remember that) while I labored at home, surrounded by loved ones. My little taste if homebirth before heading off to the hospital. Arrived at 10 am and 5cm and my gentle labor continued. I truly enjoyed the labor, standing throughout most of it until the very end, at 2pm giving birth kneeling on the bed. My water finally broke just as she was crowning and she was caught by my ND as my gracious perinatologist allowed her to. E was whisked away to be checked by the NICU team. She was born early, at 35 weeks and weighed 4 pounds 5 ounces, big for my babies. The sound of her crying, even across the room, was sweet music to our ears. They gave her back to me a few mintues later and I held her for about an hour before she had to go to the NICU. Their protocol for 35 weekers was to admit them. My greatest regret was letting her go- not questioning "protocol". I thought she would be observed for a bit and then we would get her back. Or at the most for a few days. She was in the NICU for 2 weeks before we could take her home. I still remember sobbing on the bathroom floor because she was screaming in her isolette while under the bili lights. I hate that NICU. 4 or 5 babes to a nurse. Shuffled around so I wouldn't know where she was one day to the next. She responded to the different nurses differently, liking some, but not others. One was convinced the had reflux, but E only responded that way with her. I was there every day, all day long, only heading home for sleep and to spend time with C and dh. It is still like a bad dream. I feel nauseous every time I think about it. Finally, we were able to get her home and never looked back.

We celebrate both C-boy and E last night with a couple of families. Pizza for 20, chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and lemon pound cake. Whose idea was it to make pizza for 20? Fun was had by all. I actually think we have two teens in the house because she sure acts like she is going on 16! Happy Birthday, Esther! I love you.

Teen in the House

C-boy is 13 today. Such a lovely boy growing in to such a lovely young man. He is loving and gentle, still tender with his mama, telling me he loves me, kissing me good-night every evening. I love seeing him becoming his own person, able to stand up in this household of strong personalities. I am so humbled when he advocates for himself with me while still being calm and respectful (I can be a bit, shall we say, passionate, though he says "cranky sometimes"). His spirit calms me. He is a bit introvertive- needs a lot of alone time, and yet has a few very good friends and likes to engage my friends in conversation- he may be more at ease with adults than kids his own age, sometimes- reminds me of myself. His beginning was scary- his birth an emergency cesarean- I had pre-eclampsia, so he had to be born too early, at 32 weeks, weighing 2 pounds 13 ounces. Tiny, but a fighter, really just needing to grow, no other complications. Scary, though, to be thrust into parenthood this way, into the world of NICU and the machines beeping and buzzing all around our tiny son. I was too ill to see him until his third day of life, his papa stepping into fatherhood alone, fiercely protective and advocating for his boy. And now.... thirteen years later, I can barely believe that we are here now, watching him become a young man of integrity and honor and so creative. I am so proud of him, so proud to be his mama. Happy Birthday Colin. I love you.
Here are a few of his creations. He is self-taught. Pipe Cleaners are his medium. He has been making these since he was little. Really, the details are amazing.

Marmalade Love

Dh has marmalade on toast every morning, and has been for the past few years. So I have been buying him various kinds of marmalade, some better than others, he says. As I watched C-boy slathering his pbj with the strawberry freezer jam I made last summer, I was struck by a couple of thoughts: 'I could make marmalade' and 'why haven't I ever made some?' Well, I really don't like marmalade and citrus season is in mid-winter when I am not necessarily thinking about canning. But, here we are, smack in the middle of prime citrus season, so off I go to my canning books and the internet to find "the best marmalade recipe ever" to make for dh. And, I think I found it. June Taylor makes her preserves in Berkley and has a world-wide cult following. I was able to find a few of her marmalade recipes online, being the cyber-sleuth that I am. She makes her own pectin from the membranes and seeds of the fruit and uses a lower amount of sugar in a process that can only be called a labor of love. As I love dh and a food challenge, I made a batch of Satsuma Marmalade during one of our snow days this week. Again, I don't like marmalade, it's bitter, pithy taste with large chunks of peel and membrane, but- I LOVE this marmalade. The citrus segments removed from their membrane with thin slices of peel floating in the bright citrus-y goodness accented by the sweet-tang of meyer lemon. YUM. I am in love. It didn't jel as much as I would like, I will do a few things differently next time, but it is luscious. I think so anyway, and so does dh. I do want to order some of June Taylor's to compare as she is the jam goddess, but for now, I have a new obsession. Today I will attempt Pink Grapefruit-Meyer Lemon. I can't wait to see how it turns out.

SNOW!

Is anything more fun than a snow day?!? I have had a grin on my face since I got out of bed this morning. School is cancelled, after we had already decided to stay home and play, but dh had already left for school on his bike. Yes, on his bike, 10 miles in the snow, what a stud. They cancelled after he arrived, so he headed back home via MAX and his bike again. Uncle T made a surprise visit for snowball fun and breakfast, a special treat. So now we sit, enjoying the soft, white view from our front window, listening to Sam Phillips. Snow doesn't happen here very often, so it is quite a treat. Even for a 36 yr-old mama-of-three. "Yay, God!" said E. I couldn't agree more. Off to sled with my children, walk to the coffee shop, and play in the snow, snow, snow.

Sick Day

E is sick today. We have spent the morning lounging on the couch watching Narnia and Samantha. Lil' C is fighting the same thing and grumpy and clingy. I am grumpy, too. Not sure if it is because of needy girls or because of the elimintation diet I started this week. Usually by day 5 I am feeling great. It has been hard eating nothing but protein and vegetables, especially when there are chocolate chip cookies and dh's fabulous cranberry-nut bread in the house. We have 2 family weddings coming this summer and I, too would like to look fabulous in a dress, plus this holiday season I gave myself permission to eat as I wanted and neglect my exercise. I feel so much healthier when I am eating the way that is right for me- no wheat or sugar, low carbs. But I LOVE food. And reading Ruth Reichl this week has been no help at all. I want to be her when I grow up. She describes food with such amazing detail. Alas, I am not. So... I am going to call my sister for a pep talk to help me avoid eating the tater tots coming out of the oven. They are organic and a vegetable, right?